Caring for parents in their old age | Featured Artiste: Abby Godwin

[Image Source]
Remember that riddle, What goes up and never comes down?  The answer, as you must know by now, is TAXES AGE.  Age is one thing we cannot reverse.  Regardless of your views on health-conscious or cosmetic ways of reversing age, including plastic surgery, we can all agree that each day, every one of us is getting older.  Once upon a time, people consciously decided to have lots of children as insurance for their old age.  The high mortality rate in those times due to the prevalence of diseases was a major consideration too.  Unfortunately, this is still the case in many countries, including Nigeria.  But that is not the reason for this post.

Old age is something we should plan and prepare for.  I am not only referring to retirement, but caring for parents when they are too old to take care of themselves.  It took me coming to the US to know what Alzheimer's was.  Now that I even think about it, who knows how many of those so-called "mad-men" (and women) or were living under the bridge who actually have undiagnosed and untreated cases of Alzheimer's?  The fact is that the elderly are at risk for this and many other ailments, thus making it necessary for them to depend on others for support.

In developed countries, it is common to put elderly parents in adult daycares and nursing homes, for example.  Apart from the fact that nursing home abuse is very common (yes, the so-called caregivers actually maltreat old people), I know some people consider it a "bad thing" to put their parents in nursing homes to start with.  Some see it as a way to pay "wicked" parents back for all their "wickedness."  No comment on that one.  Now, for Nigeria, I am not sure how people care for elderly parents, apart from allowing them to come and live with their children and grandchildren (that is done in developed countries too). I can imagine that it would be stressful caring for younger children (think of toddlers) and older parents too.  Apparently though, this trend is on the increase.  And the question is: what is the best way to care for older parents? Invite them to come and live with their children? Employ someone to care for them in their own homes? Put them in nursing homes? And for those who don't have any children nko, who will care for them? Please share your thoughts.

Featured Artiste: Abby Godwin

I read somewhere that Abby Godwin was a mezzo-soprano.  But that was after I had heard her single, "You are Everything" on Gospogroove's SoundCloud page.  I still do not know where exactly a mezzo-soprano falls in terms of vocal range (I am guessing it's somewhere between alto and soprano), but I can tell you that Abby can sing.

Abby Godwin / Facebook
But it was not her song, You are Everything, that really caught my attention.  It was actually another song, titled "Ayo" that did, and that is the song that will be featured here today.  It is from her 5 track EP*, Still Here, and is a re-make of a popular Yoruba song, with Abby's alternative interpretation.  I just purchased a copy yesterday, and needless to say I have been gbadun-ing it ever since.  

Here is Ayo, so you can also gbadun it:

The Review

Likes:  The instrumentation captures the essence of this song, skillfully reflecting the sweet mix of English and Yoruba.  One of the high points of this song is the background vocalists' part, where they sing:

E je ka f'ijo ati iyin gb'Oluwa ga
Let us use dance and praise to lift the Lord high
 Ayo, Ayo, a kari gbogbo wa
Joy, Joy will be the lot / portion of every one of us

The key change at this juncture is simple but classy, and distinguishes this version of the song from other versions. Abby, as the lead vocalist, plays a strong role in carrying this song forward, especially with the call and response style of the song, which is typical of our traditional African songs.

Dislikes:  Abby sounded like she was straining at some points of the song, notably while adlibbing.  Due to the simplicity of the song, there was really no need to stretch it for as long as they did (4:42).  Inasmuch as repetition helped to drive home the message, the fact that the song lacked a lot of variation means that it could have been reduced by at least one whole minute.

Recommendations: (1) Add more variety to the song in terms of extra verses, rather than just repeating the chorus.  This will justify the length of the song.  OR (2) Remove the extra repetitions, particularly towards the tail end of the song, and reduce the song by at least one minute.

More information on Abby Godwin:

Artiste's Stage Name: Abby Godwin

Artiste's Real Name: Aboyowa Godwin

Connect with Abby:  Facebook

Listen to Abby's Songs: ReverbNationSound Cloud | YouTube

Current EP & Release Date: STILL HERE | 2011

Purchase Album: CD Baby | iTunes | Amazon

Have a wonderful week!

*EP stands for 'Extended Play' and means that the recording "contains more music than a single, but is too short to qualify as a full studio album or LP." [Source]

In sharing my thoughts I will apply the principle of 'do unto others as you will have them do unto you'.
In my own old age I would not want my children to abandon me in a nursing home o. The thought of it is quite scary. I'll prefer to live with my children or live in my own home and have people around who can help with little things, bearing in my mind I wouldn't want to be treated like an invalid. By God's grace I will be in good health.

So, I think inviting parents to come and live with their children and employing someone to take care of them in their homes are both good. I just think putting my parents in a nursing home will be somehow, considering that they took care of me and provided for me even when I didn't deserve it. Although I know some old people have special needs that will be better attended to in a nursing home, so in that case.... but nursing homes are not just the norm in Nigeria now. I really don't know of any except The Old Peoples Home in Yaba, Lagos.

For the ones that don't have any children, now that's a tricky one...

Thanks for stopping by my blog and leaving a comment on my post :-)

This is a very tricky one for me. I went to see my grandma today. She stays just like a 30 minutes stroll from my house, but I hardly go to see her, cos I am just an uncaring granddaughter. She even calls to greet me more than I call, if I call. I need to repent from my ways.

I'll go with Ay's comment. I think it pretty much sums my thoughts.

AY: You're very welcome. It was my pleasure:-)

I am with you on this one o: I would not want my children to abandon me in a nursing home. It just doesn't sit well with me. The two options you've stated are good: inviting parents to live with you or employing someone to look after them in their home. Deciding what option suits you will depend on finances and personal preferences, among other things.

You reminded me of the Old People's Home in Yaba. I forgot all about that. I don't know any other retirement or nursing homes in Nigeria though.

Yes, who takes care of those who never had children? Extended family members? Food for thought...

Atilola: Yes, you definitely need to repent ... LOL! Your grandma may be surfing the net, see this post, and hold you to your word. Looks like you're off to a good start sha.

Toinlicious: Me too. Looks like she covered the points I had in mind too.


I would love to hear your thoughts. Please Share.

Related Posts Plugin for WordPress, Blogger...