Sex Education 101: At what age should you start teaching children | Featured Artiste: Moji Olusoji
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Education,
Moji Olusoji,
Music,
Sex
"Mummy, where do babies come from?" That's one of the dreaded questions parents have to answer at some point in their children's lives. Nigerian parents are not exempt, and inasmuch as our culture seems to treat such discussions as taboo, it is imperative that parents teach their children early on about sex. Why? Well, I can give you a bunch of reasons, but how about this one for starters: If you don't teach them, someone else will (friends, strangers, tapes that are marked "Dora the Explorer" but have a rather grown-up "Dora" in there, wearing a questionable looking "school uniform" and she's not teaching kids Spanish, if you know what I mean *trying to keep a straight face*). It's generally agreed that you should start talking to children in early childhood, but the question arises: what is the RIGHT age to broach the subject?
Many books have been written on this subject and some of those books are dedicated to children of certain age groups. For example: It's Not the Stork: A Book About Girls, Boys, Babies, Bodies, Families and Friends by Robie H. Harris and Michael Emberley is targeted at children from age 4 upwards. I am assuming that this means that children as young as age 4 are asking questions about sex and sexuality. With all the sex abuse that goes on, especially with young children that parents leave in the care of neighbors, relatives, friends, I would say start telling them around age 3, but I guess it varies with each child. So, the question remains: At what age would you start teaching your child(ren) about sex? [Please Note: This will NOT help you explain to your children what sort of children Miss Piggy and Kermit the Frog will "create." Drawing pictures of a creature that's a cross between a piglet and a tadpole might complicate matters though. Just saying :D]
Moji Olusoji is today's featured artiste, and I came across her song, He's Real, around September last year via Gbenga Salu on YouTube. He actually produced the video to that song. Well, since Easter was this past weekend, what's the perfect follow-up message after Jesus is Risen? Yes, you guessed it right (or maybe not): It is that "He is Real." You can listen to Moji's rendition below (and watch the video too):
Here is some more information on today's featured artiste:
[Image Source] |
Many books have been written on this subject and some of those books are dedicated to children of certain age groups. For example: It's Not the Stork: A Book About Girls, Boys, Babies, Bodies, Families and Friends by Robie H. Harris and Michael Emberley is targeted at children from age 4 upwards. I am assuming that this means that children as young as age 4 are asking questions about sex and sexuality. With all the sex abuse that goes on, especially with young children that parents leave in the care of neighbors, relatives, friends, I would say start telling them around age 3, but I guess it varies with each child. So, the question remains: At what age would you start teaching your child(ren) about sex? [Please Note: This will NOT help you explain to your children what sort of children Miss Piggy and Kermit the Frog will "create." Drawing pictures of a creature that's a cross between a piglet and a tadpole might complicate matters though. Just saying :D]
Featured Artiste: Moji Olusoji
Moji Olusoji is today's featured artiste, and I came across her song, He's Real, around September last year via Gbenga Salu on YouTube. He actually produced the video to that song. Well, since Easter was this past weekend, what's the perfect follow-up message after Jesus is Risen? Yes, you guessed it right (or maybe not): It is that "He is Real." You can listen to Moji's rendition below (and watch the video too):
THE REVIEW
Likes: The introduction was simple and went straight to the heart of the message, using engaging beats and the repetition of "He's Real." Moji takes control of this song from beginning of this song and the minimal use of auto-tune actually enhances her vocal abilities. The background vocals sing in unison for the most part, and coupled with Moji's adlibs, which she neatly uses to cover the empty spots, they make for a simple, but well-structured song.
Dislikes: Inasmuch as repetition helps to drive the point home, it can also make the song boring. A little bit of variation from just repeating "He's Real" would have taken this song up another notch. Furthermore, the song-writing for the verses was a bit choppy, like it was a compilation of bible verses.
Recommendations: (1) Re-write the verses to make them flow better with the music and make them less "choppy" (2) More variation on the chorus, not just repeating "He's Real."
Here is some more information on today's featured artiste:
Artiste's Stage Name: Moji Olusoji
Artiste's Real Name: Moji Olusoji
I hope you have a wonderful week. Ciao!
You had me cracking up here.
---> "This will NOT help you explain to your children what sort of children Miss Piggy and Kermit the Frog will "create."" Hahaha
I don't think there's a "right age", because children develop differently.
Talking to kids about sex/sexuality shouldn't be awkward if we treat sex as the beautiful thing God made it to be. When my almost 4 year old asks questions like why his sister doesn't have a penis like him, I don't laugh at him or shut him down, I use it as an opportunity to teach him. Boys have penises, girls have vaginas. Your penis is private. Don't let anyone touch it. If anyone touches it, tell mummy. Don't touch anyones penis or vagina.
I've heard him tell his sister "don't touch my penis, it's private." While I hope and pray that my children never get the attention of child molesters, I'm equipping them with the tools survive in this crazy world.
When we get to the more serious stuff, I plan to treat it the same way.
I don't think there are hard & fast rules. Just be sure to educate your children or someone else will :)
When I et to the bridge of sex education, I guess I'll cross it. For now, I won't think about it so I can face other complications
It depends on what you call sex education. If its about the genitals and the reproductive system of the human body then children learn this in school anyway. I think society gets too worked up about sex education and forgets about what leads or what should lead to sex.
Sex education is taught in UK schools but they have the highest teenage pregnancy rate in Europe. So there's something inherently wrong with the way it's taught.I believe the focus should be about teaching young people relationship education. We need to start teaching our young teenage boys that girls are symbols of love not sex. And we also need to teach our young teenage girls that they can still be cool without necessarily being in a haste to lose their virginity.
I also think sex or relationship education should be age appropriate. Teaching children as young as 3 is unreasonable in my opinion. Let's allow children to enjoy the innocence of their childhood without too much interference.
ha ha, Thank God i have not gotten to that bridge yet o..ummm, i know it has to be done but i am postponing until necessary
Hehe! nice one. Dora the Explorer shey? hmm...I concur with you on introducing the topic of sex early just that it must be in the right proportion that they can handle.
One can go plain with a 16 year old on unwanted pregnancy, illicit sex, etc... but with a three year old, things like warning them from collecting gifts, visiting that brother that stays next door alone might just be okay. Information itself could be dangerous when not well-managed.
*grabs seat & furiously taking notes*
It should be at any age that they really understand what sex is. I prefer using informal settings and talking about it often, rather than having a one serious, sit-down formal session. *urgh*
Gbemi: Longest time o! Good to see you here again :-)
You'll have to blame the Kermit and Miss Piggy bit on the Muppets movie I watched the weekend I put this up. I am NOT ashamed to admit I actually enjoyed it ... LOL!
Thanks so much for sharing your mummy experience here. It really opened my eyes. Men, talk about being inquisitive! I don't know what I would have done if my child had asked the same question *opens and closes mouth like a fish* I think you're going about it the right way though, i.e. answering the questions as they come up, according to how much they can handle or understand, age-wise. And you're right: (1) There's no RIGHT age (I picked 3 though because of the book referenced and I suspect a 3-year old will ask such questions, so I can "brace" myself) and (2) You have to educate your children, or else someone else will. Thanks for sharing :-)
Atilola: *clapping hands* I feel you on "facing other complications" but I think it's a good idea to start thinking along those lines and preparing for that stage.
Nnaija4Life: Honestly, I was not even distinguishing between different aspects of sex education when I put this up. So, let's assume that this encompasses general sex education. What I was more concerned about was letting children understand earlier on how their bodies function, and not allowing people touch them inappropriately (pedophilia and sexual abuse come to mind).
While "Sex Ed" as it is called is good, like you rightly pointed out, it is NOT sufficient by itself to prevent pregnancies, etc. Sex Ed does not necessarily prevent promiscuity or indiscretion on the part of young people. I think it is important though, but there are other factors to consider. The points you mentioned about teaching boys to value girls ... Ah! Loved it! A lot of harm can be prevented if that is taken seriously, both for the girls and the boys too.
I believe in allowing children enjoy their innocence, but I also think it is important to equip them with the right type of information because everywhere they turn someone else (media, classmates, etc) is throwing all this information at them. Parents giving them that information will provide the right balance.
Jemima: LOL! I see Jesse hasn't been bombarding you with these questions yet, ba? I guess just like Atilola, when you get to that bridge you'll cross it.
Michael: LOL at Dora, shey? I think it is important to teach them early enough, even if they don't ask questions because other people will teach them anyway, regardless of age. So, it's best to hear it from mum and dad :-)
Of course, discretion is necessary though. You can't be explicit with a 3 year-old. He or she might not even fully understand it sef. I don't know, but with older kids, you can paint a "fuller picture". Definitely, keeping the age of the child in mind is important, but I think parents should at least cover the basics.
Toinlicious: *pulls another chair beside Toin and asks: "Can I borrow your pen?" LOL!
Museorigins: Longest time o! Good to see you here again :-)
You made a good point here, i.e. de-mystifying sex and discussing it informally. Like Nnaija4life pointed, they'll get the formal version in school anyways, but instead of "The Lecture" at home, you can talk about it often and openly, with discretion, of course.
Sex education is vital in bringing up a child. I believe that in other for parent to achieve something good with their kids, they need to start teaching them about sex education in their teens.
For boys, they need to start as early as 13 - 14 years and for girls, mothers need to start when the girl start reaching puberty or when she start her period.
NBLinks: You're right on sex education being vital in raising a child. But, I disagree on waiting till they're teenagers to start teaching them. In today's world, children are bombarded with information about sex, many times without parental consent. I think they need to be taught much earlier. The sooner, the better. Waiting for puberty before broaching the subject is too late in my opinion.
Thanks for visiting by, by the way
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