How Many Boyfriends or Girlfriends is Too Many?

How Many Boyfriends or Girlfriends is Too Many?

One of my favorite Yoruba movies, which is now classified as a Classic Yoruba movie, is Aya mi Owon (Madam Dearest) by Tade Ogidan (2005), starring Opeyemi Aiyeola, Sola Sobowale (a.k.a Toyin Tomato), Akin Lewis, Yemi Solade and Gabriel Afolayan among others.  This was my first Gabriel Afolayan movie, but that is not the only reason why I remember this movie with fondness.

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Don't Marry from that Village!

Don't Marry from that Village!

I know the minute you read that title, the names of a dozen villages, towns, etc that you've "heard about" just floated through your head.  Apart from tribal stereotypes, we (Nigerians) also have specific stereotypes about people from particular villages or towns.

Here's a random list of stereotypes that come to mind (feel free to add your own):

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Would You Consent to An Arranged Marriage?

Would You Consent to An Arranged Marriage?

Well, Hello! Sorry, I've been MIA for a bit, but I am back now.  How una dey?  Any special plans for Thanksgiving (it's next week o)?  I plan to stuff my face, watch movies and sleep.  Please tell me you've bought the turkey.  You want to try guinea fowl this year? Ah, you're on your own o!

Ehen, so this topic has been swimming in my head for a while now.  Arranged Marriages.  The name alone has a negative connotation to it, like a person has no choice in the matter.  But let's take a step back and look at it a bit differently.  Just a bit.

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No Biological Clock: Will Nigerian Women Marry Better Quality Husbands?

No Biological Clock: Will Nigerian Women Marry Better Quality Husbands?

Tick, tick, tick ...

No, that's not the sound of the timer telling you you're closer to eating that boli, hot and fresh from the oven (forgive the food metaphors.  Hunger is catching me as I type this). It's that other pesky one: the biological clock.

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The Changing Face of Inter-Tribal / Inter-Ethnic Nigerian Marriages in the Diaspora

The Changing Face of Inter-Tribal / Inter-Ethnic Nigerian Marriages in the Diaspora

The first thing that usually signals an inter-tribal marriage is the name of the wife and/or children.  This is not always the case, however, especially where the first or last names are English names.  

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The Gentleman Series | 5: He Must Not Be a Womanizer

The Gentleman Series | 5: He Must Not Be a Womanizer

Initially, I had planned to use the words "morally upright," but I figured that womanizer would pass along the message faster.  A womanizer, of course, is a man who is unfaithful, cheats regularly without remorse, and a generally promiscuous man.  In short, a casanova.

This is the last entry in The Gentleman Series and this point needs to be made:

The Quintessential Nigerian Gentleman is 

NOT a Womanizer

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Pregnancy out of Wedlock Should Not Automatically lead to Marriage

Pregnancy out of Wedlock Should Not Automatically lead to Marriage

A common practice among certain ethnic groups in Nigeria (and possibly Africa too) is to marry off a girl / woman who gets pregnant out of wedlock, to the man who impregnates her.  I know it is an old, traditional practice, but it is still carried out today.

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Is Polygamy (in Africa) a function of Education?

Is Polygamy (in Africa) a function of Education?

For the purposes of today's discussion, polygamy is the marriage between a man and two or more women.  I wanted to expand that definition to include men who are married to just one woman, but who have several mistresses / girlfriends / concubines or whatever label you want to use. In other words, I wanted to expand the definition of polygamy to include men who are monogamous on paper but polygamous in practice.  But, I think it would be better to leave them out for the sake of simplicity.

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