Sister, Cross your legs; Brother, Do not attempt

First of all, I want to thank God for creating human beings with just two legs.  And for opposable thumbs.  Can you imagine crossing your legs if you were dealing with four limbs rather than two?  How would that even work? If dogs could talk, maybe they would enlighten us.  But since they don't we can [ask cows instead] let our imaginations run wild.  Or just refuse to think about it. The real question is: how do spiders cross their legs? Yes, all 8 hairy legs.  All of them.  Do they sip pina coladas while carrying out this exercise?  If you can answer this question, oh boy, you're a truly deep thinker.  In fact, I troway salute in advance.  Okay, I'll stop now. Maybe Not.

[Image Source: Kemi Filani]
Now, the inspiration for today's post title (the 1st part only) was a Ghanaian movie with the same name: Sister cross your legs.  I have not watched this movie, but the title has been stuck in my mind since the day I saw it. 


It's common to see women cross their legs, but have you ever wondered  the proper way to do it? I mean, when you're wearing that extra-tight aso-ebi that cuts off blood supply to your fore-arms and legs (nothing to do with picture above), how do you cross your legs without causing the dress to rip in the wrong place? And for guys, is it proper for a man to cross his legs when he is sagging his trousers, for instance? These and many more questions have crossed my mind in the past.  Other questions that have crossed my mind include:

  • What do chickens think of human beings? Friends, Enemies or the ultimate hybrid, "Frenemies?"
  • Will monkeys take over the world by 2014? Sooner?
  • What thoughts fill the minds of pigeons (or similar birds) when they deface public places?  Revenge or just "habit"?


Out of the goodness of my heart, I'll let you guys answer these questions. You're welcome :-)

Anyway, after conducting a few searches, here is what I found out about crossing your legs:


  • [A man] "may sit cross-legged if he wish[es], but should not sit with his knees far apart, nor with his foot on his knee. [Source]

  • Crossing your legs will NOT cause varicose veins [Source]

  • Crossing your legs in some churches is considered disrespectful [Source 1] [Source 2].  When in doubt, ask the Pastor.  Or cross your legs and wait for the usher to come and harass you give you a dose of Church Etiquette 101.

  • When you're sitting down for extended periods, avoid crossing your legs [Source].

  • While interviewing for a job over a meal, "do not cross your legs at the table. Instead, keep both feet on the ground.  You may cross your feet at the ankle." [Source]

And just in case you were wondering about the proper way to cross your legs, follow these instructions:

Ankle Cross – This is a highly acceptable form of crossing your legs. You put your knees together and to the side. The side that you turn your knees is to face the person with which you are speaking to. Otherwise, you would normally turn your knees to the left. Your ankles are then pointing towards the right and you cross them in the most comfortable way. This does require that the woman develop her inner thigh muscles, but is the healthiest and most flattering way for a woman to cross her legs.


So, how would a spider execute this 'proper' method of leg crossing? *crickets chirping* You tell me *shrugs*

#NowCrossingLegsAndEatingGurudi


Kai! You're a case! Lol!

Ogecha

chai!!! as in, what were you doing when you started this whole "leg-crossing" thought?
i cant laugh abeg. ermmmmm, maybe you should add a video.........it will help a lot. thanks in advance

Okay oo.

I went for an etiquette course where they taught us how to cross our legs, tilting it to the left, etc. I should really go and get the book where I took notes and read them again.

As for church, I don't know about normal church service, I don't think there's anything wrong sha, though I don't do it.

But when you are on a deliverance ground, real deliverance o, where you are dealing with witchcrafts, demons, wicked and stubborn spirits, etc. don't even cross your legs. I won't wanna delve into this on your comment space sha.

hahaha I always cross my legs but like a proper lady i do the ankle cross tho!!!

Chei! Sorry, I couldn't read past the part that you said there is a Ghanaian movie called 'sister cross your legs'... Kai... Nollywood/Ghallywood biko mme'm ebere na biko zien... What kind of title is that... #ItsAllOver

LOL lol
I think i will wait for the bird and chicken response from ur readers....
i find it weird when men cross their legs not at the ankle but knee

Madam, your thought process en, needs it's own study. I can just imagine the spider kingdom deliberating on this very pertinent issue of crossing legs.

But Centipedes nko? *munching peanut*

Of birds & pigeons, they're probably thinking graffiti. Abi kilo feel?

So on the real though, "Sister cross your legs"??? & I thought "Beyonce & Rihanna" was bad. Smh slowly.

I go with Luciano.... add a video. lol

You dey think o.. sho!

- LDP

You are just a case, i usually cross my legs o, the ankle cross is easier though.

By the way, that colour blocked aso ebi style looks good. ilike

Ogecha: LOL! I hope you do the ankle cross o!

Luciano: A video? Ah! I might consider putting one up. What was I doing when I thought of this? I am pretty sure I was not crossing my legs :-)

Atilola: Ah, so you have attended an etiquette course? Interesting. At least you can measure your notes against what these other people recommended. Left tilting? I believe I have seen that one in action. You're definitely right about the deliverance part. Crossing your legs would be the last thing on your mind then. And as for Church, the ones I came across that had rules against crossing your legs were Orthodox churches. I am yet to visit a Naija church where they will reprimand me for crossing my legs.

Lohi O: Way to go! The ankle cross is quite popular, I see :-)

Nollywood ReInvented: LOOOOOL! #ItsAllOver I actually liked the title. Maybe that's because I did not actually watch the movie. But I assure you, that movie exists, title and all!

Unveiling Gold: Me and you apparently are the ones waiting o, cos so far no one has ventured to answer the question. If only animals could talk ...

So, you actually make a distinction for men crossing their legs? Honestly, I find it more than a tad bit strange to see a man crossing his legs. Pretty Strange.

Toinlicious: The spiders still have not released that book on crossing 8 legs. I hope they stop wasting time and release it already. Inquiring minds want to know ...

Centipedes ke? I think they are also waiting for the spiders so they can teach it at Centipede University. Crossing your Legs 101. *smh*

*munching kuli-kuli*

Grafitti ke? Omo, even if that was their excuse it is still wrong. The worst part is they keep a straight face while "doing it." I vote for revenge.

Samuel Ekundayo (LDP): LOL! I will consider putting up the video.

Jemima: Ah, another "ankle-cross" supporter, I see! Yes, the ankle cross is easier ... and apparently, more common.

Toinlicious: Yes, I like the old school way they tied their wrappers. Cute!

Allz I know is, I love the outfits in the picture!

Nollywood Forever: They are cute, aren't they? :-)

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